Ellen,

We have been working as a couple on a large ranch in Idaho for the past six years, basically running the inside and outside, except for the cattle, horses and other animals. This is a large ranch and the hands do that work. We have been at the same salary for all this time, have become close to our employers and are having a hard time asking for a raise. It’s really time, but we don’t want to move if we get an answer we don’t like. Do you have any advice for us?
The J. E.s in Idaho

Dear Mr. & Mrs. E,
This is a difficult one. Sometimes when employees get close personally to their employers, their salary is a most difficult subject to broach. However, you could try asking them to sit down informally because you need to talk with them. Keep the conversation light, and do not show any anger or frustration. Even before you have the discussion with your employer, you should ask yourselves: “If we do not get a raise, would we stay in that position anyway?” It sounds like you have developed a nice bond with the family, so if your answer is no, maybe you’re not yet ready to talk about this. If you are not ready to leave, it may not be worth the conversation.
Good luck. Ellen

Dear Ms. Ellen,

I have a question. I am currently working as a house manager in a 12,000-square-foot country home that my employers use only on the weekends. I originally agreed to work all weekends and have Wednesday and Thursdays off. There are, however, many weekends they don’t come here. I was wondering if, after 6 months, you think it would be a problem to ask if I could take a day off on the weekends they don’t come? I would appreciate any help with this . The company that placed me here has been of no help to me.
W. R., Stratham, New Hampshire

Dear W,
This is a very hard thing for me to say to you but here goes – This schedule is what you knew and agreed to when you took this job, so you should be willing to work the days you originally agreed upon.
Good luck. Ellen

Dear Ellen,

I am a Nanny and work for a very prominent family, or at least they call themselves that. The father is a prominent businessman and the mother is well-known worldwide. I have been working for the family for more than a year sharing duties with two other nannies . I am the “Head Nanny,” as they call me. The others work evenings and weekends. I have really had it with the other two nannies because they are always canceling and I have to cover for them. I have brought up the issue with my employers but they just don’t want to hear it. They seem to like the other nannies and I just don’t know what to do. Help!
A.L.C., Chicago

Dear ALC,
I agree that it is unfair for you to always be covering for the others unless you are paid overtime or a salary that covers that. You could, perhaps, speak with the other nannies if you are in charge of them and maybe get some sort of team spirit going – letting them know that if one calls out the other will work. I guess the best way to approach this is to ask for a meeting with your employers to see if you can get your employer’s blessing for the plan. If they agree, I’ll bet things will straighten out with the two other nannies.
Good luck. Ellen